WEEK TWO TRANSCRIPTION
WEEK 2: BEGIN WITH THE END IN MIND
Begin right now! Open up a space inside your heart to receive the love of your life.
Jo Ann: Hi, Cel.
Jo Ann: Good to see you.
Cel: Good to see you too.
Jo Ann: I did want to say that there were few things that I wanted to cover before we begin today with the technical part about what we’re doing here. What we’re doing is a magnetic attraction process. We want to magnetize people to you. You want finding your soulmate to be easy and in that way, if you’re magnetizing people to you it will be a lot easier. So as we go through each week we are working on the principle that you’re building a kind of a magnetic field around yourself so that around you more and more positive experiences come in. So I just want to talk a minute about that magnetic field and that attraction process. When we were born, we were born, we breathed water in the womb. When we were forming we were breathing water in the womb. So we grew in water, in the substance of water that was what we grew in. After we were born and, you know, we started to breathe air and we became more and more human in the sense that we could work independently of our mother, our systems became 50% water, so we are comprised of 50% water. And why am I saying this? It’s really important that we remember that our system is made of a substance that is a liquid, fluid, it flows. And any kinds of interruptions to that just like a river that flows, if you’ve got a dam in the river it’s no longer, the water doesn’t flow anymore. Well, it may not flow well, it may still flow but there may not be the kind of vibrancy to the water, if the dam wasn’t there, or there’s rocks in the river or the stream, and the water has to go around them, and I’m gonna use that example as a metaphor for us getting ready to find that beautiful life which would ideally be beautiful, like a beautiful free-flowing stream or a beautiful free-flowing water source such as a river. And how do we do that? Well, as we go through each segment of the course, we’re building up a magnetic field to attract people into our lives. And what we want to do is to make that attraction as strong as possible without having the interference of, as we gave examples, of a dam in the waterway or rocks in the waterway. We want our energy to flow so that we are open and ready for the universe to deliver that beautiful person in our life.
So we started out last time together getting very crystal clear about what it is you wanted in that relationship, and we started out by saying what you don’t want in a relationship and what you do want. And I do want to go into week 2 which is a different theme that builds on this, but I want to review a bit of week 1 and then go into week 2 because week 2 it’s shorter in terms of what I can go over with you because it’s more an action-oriented chapter in the course.
So let’s start and go back over. Have you had a chance to look at your list, build your list and did you actually identify the five top things you cannot live without?
Cel: Alright, I actually have seven things on my list. I have a top seven. It’s difficult to trim them down to five.
Jo Ann: Yes.
Cel: Well, do I really have to make it just five?
Jo Ann: It’s best that you do that because then you’re really questioning yourself about what are your true feelings about what you can’t live without. It really helps you dig deeper. But if you could go and tell me what those top five are maybe I can help you with that, or top seven.
Cel: Top seven. All right. I have my list here, so number one he loves God. And then No. 2 loves children. Third, loves music, he likes to sing or play an instrument. He is emotionally and physically available and wants a monogamous relationship with me. And then fifth, he is free of addictions such as drugs, alcohol, wine, video games, womanizing. And my top six is he takes responsibility for his life.
Jo Ann: For his life? Responsibility…
Cel: For his life…for his life, yes. And then he loves and respects his family and he has a great relationship with them. Yeah, number seven.
Jo Ann: Okay. Now would this partner who has an ideal relationship with his family, would he most likely love children?
Cel: Yeah, I would think so.
Jo Ann: Okay, let’s consider putting loves children lower on the list. I’m just suggesting that.
Cel: Oh all right. Okay.
Jo Ann: Because if he has a great relationship with his family he is most likely a loving person and would love children. Okay, I’m just suggesting that.
Okay, if he takes responsibility for his life he most likely would be a type of person who would be free of addictions. So let’s look at the possibility of putting free of addictions underneath your top five.
Okay, so it could read like he loves God, he loves music, he is available and wants to be in a monogamous relationship with me, he is responsible for his life, he takes responsibility for his life, and he has an excellent relationship with his family. And then underneath that, he loves children and he is free of addictions.
Cel: Okay. Yeah, that makes sense, yes.
Jo Ann: Okay. So you have done an amazing job. This is not an easy task.
Cel: Yes, it was not.
Jo Ann: Okay. And you may find that as you go along and you’re dating, you may find that something else has taken a higher precedent than you actually thought it would and you might rearrange one or two of those top five. But if you put it right underneath your top five, you know that those are extremely important, but your top five will be an absolute plan that you would not continue dating that person if those, all five of those, did not come into place.
Cel: So if he doesn’t have those five qualities, I will not date him anymore, is that correct?
Jo Ann: Correct. That’s my suggestion.
Jo Ann: Alright. So you find somebody who is a great musician and he is like totally God-centered and seems to really be an honest person who wants to have a relationship with you, but he doesn’t have a good rapport with his family. So then you might have to either think about how is that really very deeply important, or is it not? I have to tell you that I did forget that one – has a good relationship with his family. I did forget that one on my list of 30 things when I put it together, and I dated somebody who came from a criminal background. His family came from a criminal background. And I realized that what I really wanted was somebody whose family I can embrace and feel like I had an extended family. So I had to take one of my top five off of the top five and put he has a great relationship with his family as one of my top five. And I stopped dating that person. So sometimes you kind of juggle around and you look at what you believe to be true and it may take adjustment.
However, why are we doing a list? It’s to get that magnetism going. And the magnetism is you’re sending out I want somebody who loves God, I want somebody who loves music and is involved in that. I want somebody who has a great relationship with their family. Those are the vibes that you’re sending out and when we send out something we do get it back. So that brings me to talk about the law of attraction.
The law of attraction brings back to you that which you send out vibrationally. So if we’re 50% water, our bodies are 50% water, and if you go to a pond and you throw a rock in the pond, it creates ripples.
Jo Ann: Right? It creates, and the ripples go, sometimes, and I think this is correct, they usually go out to the outer edge of that pond if it’s a small pond. Okay. It goes pretty far. You throw the rock in and the ripples go pretty far and they go pretty far out. Okay.
We are 50% water. If we laugh and we’re happy, right, we just had a joyous time with our friends and we’ve laughed until our bellies hurt. Those vibrations ripple out and we are, in fact, kind of sending out signals of happiness. Okay. The more signals of happiness that are sent out, the more happiness comes back. So you had a great time with your friends, you laughed a lot, you hug them, you say goodnight and you say, come on let’s do this again. Right. And so they’re excited and they say, yeah let’s get together next week. Okay, so there’s that you put it out, that high vibration of happiness and joy and you’re getting it back. Your friends say yeah, I want to get together with you again, it was so much fun, I really enjoyed that.
This is what we’re aiming for, for us to stay in a place where we are happy for the most part, I mean, as you know, considering that life does have some downers, there are times when we won’t be happy. But to see if we can reach that point of happiness again after we’ve gotten through that down point. Or joyful or appreciative. Being very appreciative, appreciative of and thankful for the sunset, thankful for the beautiful animals that are in the world, if you love animals. And thank you for the flowers. All that ripples out thankfulness and gratitude and it attracts back to you. If you’re angry and you’re a cynical person, you are going to attract angry and cynical people to you. So if you keep putting out that you’re mad and you’re sick of the world and blah blah, you’ll find that people in your experience have similar viewpoints.
So we attract to us those deeper feelings that we have and the ripple effect of that vibration going out with similar beliefs that come in. So you would, let’s say you want, and I know you do, you want somebody who loves music and they’re involved in music. So the more music you play, you know, when you’re walking around, whether it’s a headset, or the more you sing, or the more you listen to music that you like, you know, that vibration of a deep love of music is there and that’s being sent out. So what we are it’s almost like a beacon of light in a lighthouse, we’re sending out these signals of what it is we truly deeply honor and respect and really want in our lives, and that beacon of light has to come back, that energy has to return to you, because what we focus on is what expands.
As Oprah Winfrey says if you’re focusing on I don’t like this, I don’t want that, that’s what’s coming back to you. What you don’t want is coming right back to you if you focus on that. If you focus on I do really love music and I can’t wait to turn on this radio, because that’s my favorite channel and I’d like to sing to it and move to it and whatever, then you’re more engaged in that element.
So congratulations on doing your list. Did you manage to find 30 things to put on your list?
Cel: Well, I still have 10 more.
Jo Ann: Ah, okay.
Cel: So I am still continuing to think about it, so maybe I can complete it soon.
Jo Ann: Okay. So I do want to say that this exercise alone, just this exercise alone, I’ve worked with somebody who was a peer of mine and she said to me, she was at a meeting with me, we were at a counsellor’s meeting, and she came over to me and she said, I know you wrote a book and I know it’s all about finding that perfect mate and I’m just gonna ask you right now, please just give me one thing to work on. One thing. I want one thing to work on.
So I said to her make a list of 30 things that you want in a relationship. Be sure it’s in the positive, that there aren’t negatives in there. If it is negative, turn it around and make it a positive statement. And then figure out what are your top five and outline those top five and those are the ones that are deal breakers. So when you go on dates, if that person doesn’t embody all five, then you’ll just move on from there and stop dating. A year and a half go by, don’t hear anything, this is the only thing I said to my peer, she wasn’t really looking for coaching at the time, but she really wanted a relationship. And I ran into her about a year and a half later and she goes..oh I forgot to tell you I got married.
Cel: Woooooooooow. Just for making that list.
Jo Ann: I found my soulmate. And I said oh my God, that’s amazing and wonderful. I’m so happy for you. And she said, yeah, I used that list of 30 things to really get things very clear. It helped, it helped tremendously.
So even if you, in the rest of this course, and I know we’re gonna go through many different aspects, and what we’re doing is we’re building up that magnetism, this is the thing that could go on. You can change this list, modify it, add your next seven that you need to do and this is a very powerful tool. And the idea is if you can imagine being with somebody who loves music, and you can imagine what it feels like to share that life with that person, you know, you can spend some time just visualizing what it might be like if somebody embodied those characteristics that you would like and, what would be like for you to be with them, in a very loving, beautiful, committed relationship.
Cel: Alright. So I also have to visualize aside from the list that I made. Is it something that I have to do, like, regularly?
Jo Ann: I would, I would certainly do it once a week, review it and make sure that you finish it. Okay. But I worked on my list for a good year. Because, as I said, sometimes I’d be dating and they wouldn’t have the top five things, and so I’d have to think about it. Are those really my top five things or do I, did I miss something. And sometimes we miss something that is even more valuable and it’s important to put the lesson we learned from the relationships that failed in the top five. Right? So, you know, I definitely would encourage you to do that. So, and you’re doing great with that.
Cel: (Noise) Thank you, thank you.
Jo Ann: Can you hear me? (Noise)
Cel: Yes, yes, I can hear you.
Jo Ann: Okay. I do want to go on to chapter 2. Did you get a chance to read it over and would you give me your impressions?
Cel: Well, I’ve read it briefly, yes, and it says there you suggested to declutter, decluttering my life. So there were questions there that I found very helpful because those are the things that are cluttering my life right now. Like there was one question I remember, what part of the, what room in the house do I have to declutter, so it made me go through my life and also where I live, my present environment.
Jo Ann: Aha. Okay. I hear a dog in the background, is that your dog?
Cel: Yeah. Very excited. Maybe someone passed by.
Jo Ann: Oh. Okay. Okay. Let me say, let me share with you why this section of the course talks about decluttering your life. It’s a metaphor for the universe to really begin to give us what we want. And if our life is full of clutter, if our life is full of stuff that we don’t need, or things that cause us to feel anxious when we try to find them, then that’s a kind of a withhold to allow something new to come in. So I encourage you to take a look at your environment and see if there’s, and I would like you to start with your bedroom. Okay, is there a place in your bedroom that is cluttered that you could declutter. Your closet, or some of the drawers in your dresser, or the environment itself? Can you declutter your bedroom and start to make it much more open and inviting to the universe, that there’s space and there’s not this clutter which causes confusion in our minds and causes confusion in our whole system actually.
So one of the recommendations I have for you, Cel, is to look at your closet, you could start in your closet, even if it’s on one side of your closet. Begin to take away the clothes that don’t fit you anymore, or that you’ve been hesitating to give away, because they’re too small or they’re too big and see if you can start to clear out some clutter out of your closet. And even leave a small space in your closet open, not used, like even a little part of the rack where you hang your clothes or where you put your shoes, or what you do up above where you put things on shelves. If you can leave some space open as a metaphor for the universe to let them know that you are open and you are ready to let that and inviting in a new person into your life. And there’s space for that person.
Cel: Okay. Find space for that person.
Jo Ann: Yeah, it’s leaving space. I was talking to a person who was single and she really wanted a relationship badly in her life. And I’ll talk about this because she was a colleague and not a client. Another colleague. And I asked her what does your bedroom look like? You know, can you describe your bedroom to me? Oh, she said, right now my bedroom, on my bed I have some boxes where I’m sorting out my bills and I’m redoing my bills and I put them all on my bed. And the books and stuff that I got recently I have in boxes beside my bed, and she said, and other things. She described other things about her room, that, that to me I got a very strong impression it was very cluttered. And that some of the things that she was sending out as kind of beacons are my life is cluttered and busy and I’m too full and I’m not really ready to have a relationship.
So my suggestion was is to declutter that bedroom, make sure that any papers and things that have to do with business are not in her sleeping environment. That the business stuff is put somewhere else in the house where when you go to that place you’d think I’m doing business here but I’m not sleeping here. And that where you sleep should be restful and peaceful and a place for you to nurture yourself. And that the two don’t mix, having business stuffs in your bedroom doesn’t mix with serenity, peace and enjoying your sleep and knowing that when you close your eyes that you should just move in to that space of relaxation and renewal.
And what I’m suggesting to you is that you might be able to just start in a small way of decluttering and leave a space in your closet as a metaphor for if someone comes in they could just put their stuff right there and they’re in your life.
How does that sound?
Cel: Well, something that I could certainly do right now with my closet. There’s so many stuff there that, you’re right, I could, you know, give away that I don’t use anymore, that someone else could have use for.
Jo Ann: Yes.
Cel: And the metaphor about making space for that person in your closet, it somehow reminds me that I also have to make space for that person in my life, if ever..
Jo Ann: Yeah.
Cel: If ever I’m about to meet him. Because right now my life, I am so busy with stuff in my life. And during our previous conversation, I mentioned that I only have extra time during the weekends. So that’s also something, my schedule is also something that I have to declutter to welcome that person.
Jo Ann: Absolutely. Yes.That’s an amazing insight that you had there. It’s just wonderful. If we sometimes make ourselves too busy, I’m gonna say this, I’ve seen some of my clients who have made themselves too busy because they really don’t want that relationship to come in. They just, that’s another way of keeping the relationship out. It’s I’m too busy, I’m too busy, I’m too busy. So be aware of that, take note of that and decide. Can you allow a little space in your closet, can you allow some space in your life to actually be available to go on dates, or available to go to single events or go on line and begin to match yourself up with somebody. Where and how would that person fit in with what you currently have. So when you’re ready to do that, it’s important to look at how and where can you open up some space. And the decluttering is so so important. It’s not just your bedroom, it’s decluttering your house, it’s decluttering your mind, it’s decluttering, you know, so many things. Because when you have papers and books and stuff that’s all, you know, that’s kind of occupying your personal space, you are missing your time to sleep, your time to renew, your time to get that important renewal and renewing your cells and everything when you’re sleeping at night. When you’re infringing on that you need to take a look at that and then start clearing stuff out and make sure that you honor and respect and take care of yourself. Because when you love yourself, that love comes outward. If you’re not loving yourself you’re not gonna be able to have a successful relationship loving somebody else. Love starts within. Love starts with in taking care of your self, honoring yourself. Getting in your life those items that you just mentioned – somebody to share your life with who loves music, somebody who loves God, and you can now connect with somebody who is on a spiritual plane as you are, and so on and so forth, that will definitely enrich your life deeply.
And so because I was single for so many years, I was single for 17 years before I met my husband, we dated for 2 years. It was important that I begin to take a look at the things about how I could nurture myself during those single years. Because I was very involved in my own business and being an entrepreneur and all what it takes to make ends meet and to make money and so on. And yet it’s a balance. We have to have a healthy balance between time and nature and walking and beauty and working behind the desk and, you know what I’m saying, there’s a balance. So to love yourself and to know what you need and to nurture yourself is really important.
Cel: So I have to really nurture myself and learn to love myself. And also when you mentioned about being busy that’s so me, because I have, my friend and I, started a small pre-school. And for the past 10 years, we’ve been working so hard to build it, to get students for this school, to get it to where it is right now, and I think we’ve managed to do a pretty good job at it and now I could delegate the other tasks to the other people at school and I would have more time for myself.
Jo Ann: Congratulations on every level – one is that you’ve had the foresight and the wisdom and the vision to create something that you love and it’s hard work, really hard work.
Cel: Yes, it is.
Jo Ann: And that you now know that you can delegate some of that work to somebody else which frees you up more to be taking care of yourself more.
Cel: Yes. That’s right, yes.
Jo Ann: Yey.
Jo Ann: Awesome.
Jo Ann: Alright. Did you have any questions before we end?
Cel: Oh well, just a few questions or clarifications actually about the law of attraction. You mentioned that what we feel we attract. Is that correct?
Jo Ann: What we focus on.
Cel” What we focus on.
Jo Ann: Yes. And also what we feel, also what we feel.
Cel: Alright, So it’s not just based on feelings.
Jo Ann: So the higher vibrations of love, appreciation, even just peace, are all higher vibrations. The more we can be in those states of higher vibrations, like prayer, the more you can be in that, the more that like water that a stone gets thrown into that vibrates out and it signals those experiences and it brings back that to you. And again that goes with negativity, if you’re an angry person and you’re mad and you cut people off while you’re driving in traffic and you’re, you know, you got road rage, that’s gonna keep coming back to you, you’re gonna find more and more people that you’re gonna get mad at or who are gonna get mad at you as you’re driving. Other people can drive down the street and have a totally peaceful experience and it turns out really good. So you attract to you that which you are feeling, as you said feeling, or believing. And I should say not or believing. I should say and believing. Like if you believe that there are no good men out there, of which a number of women have told me and I haven’t agreed with, then that’s what’s gonna come back. The women who have said to me there are no good men out there are attracting men who are either players or, you know, they just want, they’re in the relationship for the sex or whatever the case may be. They keep attracting that kind of person over and over and then they throw up their hands, there are no good men out there. But they’re operating from the belief that there are no good men out there. And that’s what’s causing that to come back to them, those experiences to come back to them.
If you go out in the world and you believe that there is a beautiful, wonderful human being who deeply loves God and who is a perfect match for you, he’s looking for you, he wants to meet you, he wants his life to be brighter and even better by having you in it then you will attract that.
Cel: Alright. So feeling and believing.
Jo Ann: Yes, yes.
Cel: Be positive.
Jo Ann: And if you’re and if you’re, we’re not in a perfect world. If you’re upset about something, you feel hurt, you’ve had a loss, you’re grieving or any of those things, those are human feelings and you have all the right to feel sad or hurt or in grief. And allow your feelings to be there. Be yourself. And when you get through that, allow yourself to begin to say, you know, happiness is a choice, I can choose to start to go out in the world and find things that make me happy and start to rebuild my life. And that’s when you start changing the belief that I can rebuild my life, I can have a happy life again and I’m going to do that. That’s changing the tide and that’s really bringing in the switch in what you’re sending out magnetically to the universe to send back to you.
Cel: Yeah, so, I’ll keep those things in mind.
Jo Ann: Yeah.
Cel: Well, I think I don’t have any questions anymore, so I’ll go back to completing my list of 30 things.
Jo Ann: Yes, and working on your closet.
Cel: Yeah, that’s right. . and my schedule . . I knew you’re going to bring that up. Okay, I have to find time to declutter my closet. Yeah, I was hoping you forgot all about that. Now I have to do it, to really do it. Okay.
Jo Ann: All right.
Cel: Well, anyway, thank you so much. I’ve learned so much from this talk. And, well I’m just so excited to go to the next level.
Jo Ann: I’m excited, I’m excited. Thank you for having me with you on your journey. It’s such a pleasure. Have a great day.
Cel: Thank you so much. Yes, you too. Bye bye
Jo Ann: Thank you. Babye.
Cel: See you.